Why, after I have given you ample chances to escape, have you chosen to face death now?

Logan: We finally realized that The Faggots of Death pretty much deserve to be in our place…but we’re too stubborn to quit.

Yes! You are foolish mortals! Now, my superior band plays a different type of rock and roll from Dead To Fall. What genre do you classify your music as?

Jon: Heavy.

Are you comfortable with the Metalcore tag?

Logan: Nobody cares. I don’t know…hopefully people realize that we branch out from that also.

I hear a bit of a Jazz vibe in some of your songs.

Tim: While I was growing up, most of my time behind the drum set was spent in Jazz bands. I guess my approach to Metal, as I apply it to drumming, is with a jazz feel.

Then why aren’t you in a Jazz band now?

Logan: We stole him. We had a garage band in High School and we played him Meshuggah, because we knew he would love it.

What are some un-metal groups you are into?

Jon: Bjork, Sleepytime Gorilla Museum…

Chad: I love Tegan and Sara, motherfuckers. They play poppy, acoustic, love songs.

Are they lesbian? Do you wish that they were?

Chad: They look like dykes, but I don’t know what the truth is. I’m into them though.

Logan: Sunn O, King Tubby

Aaron: Brand New Shoes. That’s all I listen to.

Tim: I listen to a lot of Jeff Buckley and I always am listening to a lot of Rush.

If you were a member of the Village People, which member would you be?

Aaron: I’d be the guy with the handle bar…

The leather man!

Tim: I’d be the cop.

Jon: I’d be the indian

Chad: I’d like to be the fireman…

There is No fireman in Village People, mortal! Grrrr.

Chad: Well, what’s left?

Construction worker!

Logan: I want to be the construction worker!

Very well! ….so back to your puny, mortal group. How did Dead To Fall begin?

Jon: We were bored. We started playing at our old drummer’s grandma’s house. We played to annoy his grandma until she kicked us out. So, we rented a space so that we could annoy ourselves by playing music. There were some member changes and we eventually moved to Minneapolis. And now, we rule and we’re from Minneapolis.

How many CD’s do you have out?

Jon: Three. The newest one is The Phoenix Throne

At what point did you get signed? When did this occur?

Jon: 2002. The very beginning.

Oh, all THREE of your releases are on Victory Records?

Jon: Yep.

That’s quite a feat. How did you achieve this?

Jon: I don’t know. Maybe because I’m from Chicago and most of the band was from Chicago. Victory Records is based in Chicago so…We were a band for two and a half years before we got signed. We just were playing, got some songs around. Victory apparently liked what they heard so that was pretty much that. They went to several shows, came to a practice, we did a showcase – all kinds of stuff.

I am only familiar with Victory’s former publicist Heather, who I find most acceptable. She has now left and Tom is in charge of bringing me fresh meat. You shall now tell me about him.

Jon: He’s about 32. He lives with Rick from Victory…

Are they both lovers?

Jon: No. I thought they were when I went to a party there, because their house is way, too clean. I slept on the couch once, because I was just too drunk to go anywhere else.

Do you think one of them tried to play with your anus while you dozed in such a mortal, alcoholic slumber?

Jon: Not that I’m aware of.

Does Tom have a large bulge?

Jon: I don’t know. He wears kind of baggy pants. He’s pretty good looking.

If you were gay, what do you think would be his greatest asset?

Jon: His hair. It’s black and shiny and flows in the wind (everybody laughs).

Most acceptable. So, do you find being on a label to be an acceptable experience? Or do you relish the idea and innocence of being underground?

Jon: No, we definitely like being on a label.

Most bands try to improve upon past mistakes when they record a new CD. What did you try to improve upon with The Phoenix Throne?

Logan: We branched out.

Jon: We brought it different types of Metal, different types of influences. We all listen to weird, obscure shit. It’s definitely beginning to show in our music. The next record will probably show it more too….just…diving into little musical places that not a lot of other bands have gone to. We can push the limits on what people think we can do and push the limits of what we think we can do as well.

Chad: Each song on The Phoenix Throne has it’s own character. I hate bands that have songs that all sound the same. Those bands fuckin’ suck.

While I understand a band such as yours touring with other Metalcore bands, I found it intriguing when you toured with Obituary.

Aaron: It was fun. We actually did two tours with them. The first one was out on the East Coast. This last time it was on the Wast Coast. Those guys are pretty awesome, though they are a bunch of red necks (laughs). They rule, they’re crazy.

How did Obituary fans take to you?

Jon: The Whiskey (A Go Go) we had difficulties. Probably 75% of the people were into us, but a couple of the guys started heckling us. I was mad because I was drunk. I wanted to throw beer bottles at them and spit at them. I tried to confront them.

It’s a shame you weren’t a female mortal band like L7, where you could simply pull out a tampon and throw it at such imbeciles (everybody laughs)

Jon: I saw L7 when I was in 7th grade and the lead singer spit on me. I was really stoked (more laughter)…. Most of the places we tour – especially the East Coast – we do pretty awesome. We did really good hear in Denver.

What band do you covet touring with?

Aaron: Well, in my opinion, I think a goal of the band in 2007 would be to tour with Korn. I think everyone would agree. I also would like to tour with Zombie and Cult of Luna.

Jon: I think touring with Korn would be bad ass. I would also like to tour with Ice Cube and…Broadzilla.

I have crossed paths with Broadzilla. They will die!

Jon: They are a great band.

Had there ever been a time, you wanted to quit?

Jon: Yeah. I once quit. The touring life gets hard. It’s awesome but…you get sick of being on the road sometimes. Band communication is important. If a band isn’t communicating it just isn’t going to be able to stay on the road. I did quit, but I rejoined like, two weeks later.

On the flip side, tell me something that has happened to you or the band that made you realize this is all worth it.

Aaron: Playing Hellfest in France. Playing with thee biggest bands like Alice In Chains, Opeth, Soulfly….it was great. Playing to an arena sized crowd…I mean, you just throw up your horns and everybody calls back at you. It’s insane.

Jon: None of the kids knew who we were, but there was this giant mosh pit. Everybody had their horns up, everybody was chanting…it was awesome.

If you had a choice between always playing in front of that kind of audience or an intimate audience,which would suit your preference?

Jon: I wouldn’t want to have to choose between the two. There’s benefits to both. Sometimes playing a little VFW hall that’s all packed and sweaty can be great.

Any final words, doomed mortals?

Jon: Yes, I heard the Maris The Great and The Faggots of Death single today and it ruled

Yes!

Aaron: And also, if any of you out there come across Maris and he asks to see your pee pee, show it to him, because almost all pee pees are noble to him.